Easter

We have had a doozy of a week this week,

and I just finally got a chance to upload all our pictures from Easter weekend.

We had a ward party at the park on Saturday.

Ellie's allergies had been pretty crazy all week

and by Saturday she was pretty miserable.

Sunday we woke up all feeling really cruddy. Ellie was a mess, and I felt like I'd been hit by a truck. We decided we better stay home from church, so we spent the day at home, doing a few Easter activities and trying to get feeling better.

We did an egg hunt in the morning. Abigail was all over it. She was very proud that she got SO many more eggs than Ellie.

We made Resurrection Rolls, and that was a pretty cool activity. Abigail loved the visual.

Ellie loved the marshmellows.

The rest of the day, we just tried to talk about the Savior a lot, and answer all of Abigail's questions. We watched a few videos the church put out. I hated not going to church, but we tried our best to focus on the Savior for the day.

I know Ellie looks happy in the pics but TRUST me, it was not pretty. Monday we took her in and she had ear infections in both ears, possible strep, and hand foot mouth disease. Yuck.

I asked Abigail to tell me about the Resurrection, and here it is- according to her. I hope you can understand it all, its pretty darn cute, and of course, she has to sing it.

Here are the rest of our pictures from Easter if you want to check them out.

When a failure becomes a triumph.

Saturday I ran my third half marathon.

I had high hopes. I had a goal to make it a personal best. I knew they would have pacers, and I whole-heartedly believed I could find my pacer, and hang with them for 13.1 miles.

Here is a recap of race day:

Actually... lets start with the day before the race. I was stupid. Over the last 6 months, I have discovered that I am gluten intolerant. I am in denial about it some days. I will do pretty well for weeks at a time, to the point where I convince myself it isn't an issue. Then I will eat something I shouldn't, and feel terrible. Each time the reaction gets worse. Well, Friday before my race, I made some cookies for Charles. I had made great efforts to eat a clean healthy diet all week so I would be feeling my best on race day.... then I made cookies.

What was I thinking? I couldn't resist and ate some cookies. Within a few hours I was feeling pretty bad, and went to bed early feeling really nauseous. I woke up early on Saturday, still not feeling well, bowels were a mess, if you get what I'm saying....

I drove up with a friend to the race, and after we parked, had to take a 30 minute shuttle bus (school bus) to the race venue. I spent the last couple of miles squatted next to the bus driver hugging his trash can in case I threw up.

We got there, and I immediately got in line for the bathroom. Digestion issues still knocking at the door. Just before the race start, I decided to hit the bathroom one more time for good measure. Sorry... that's probably totally more than anyone cares to know...

Luckily, during the race, I didn't have any surprises. And thank goodness for that.

I knew the course was hilly. I had been told that mentally, it was a very tough course because of all the hills, and lots of switchbacks. I tucked those nuggets of knowledge away.

I found my pacer. She held a sign that said: 2:10 (goal finish time). I vowed to keep her in my sites at all costs. Gun fires, race starts, and I'm off.

I hang with her pretty well the first three miles, when I realize... I have been running hills for 3 miles straight, and I didn't look at the course map ahead of time, but I'm not so sure that these hills are going to stop any time soon. I decided, if I wanted to finish, I would have to compromise on my pace. I slowed a bit, but decided I would keep her in my sites, and would not let the 2:20 pacer pass me.

By Mile 6.5, I was actually trying to call Charles mid-run to give me some encouragement. I was on the verge of tears, because the race was only half over, and the hills had not let up. There had been one short stretch of flat road, but had been at least 6 miles of rolling hills.

About mile 7, it finally leveled out for a down and back stretch of road, where I was able to look for my other friends running. That was a nice distraction. About Mile 9 there was another big climb. One I decided walking up was the best option. Mentally, I was beat. My stomach was having sharp pains, my feet and knees were hurting. I was done. The 2:20 pacer passed, me... I felt completely defeated. I realized that not only would this be far from my best half marathon time, it would likely be my worst.

We took a turn into the resort where the finish was at about mile 10-11. Then we wound through the golf course for the last 3 miles. I had nothing left. I told myself over and over again, "Heather, you have had TWO babies. You can run 3 more miles!!"

But I just couldn't. I had to walk/jog the last 3 miles, with more walking than I would like to admit. I kept telling myself, you can run for this whole song... You can run till you get to that turn... ok, walk until you get to that sign, then you can run the rest of the race... The last mile... you can run the last mile without stopping...

Then the 2:30 pacer passed me. I realized at this point, I just had to make it to that finish line. By any means imaginable. By the time I got to the last half mile, I dug deep down inside me (ok, maybe it was just my pride that there were spectators at that point), and ran the last stretch. I crossed the finish line.

I didn't look for friends immediately. I didn't scan the spectators for a friendly face.

On the verge of tears, I grabbed a bottle of water, and headed to an empty staircase by myself.

I had totally failed.

I sat down, feeling defeated, feeling very sick, very tired.

I looked out over the beautiful Texas Hill Country that I had just spent 2:35 running up and down... and I thought... I did it.

I didn't fail.

Failure would have been stopping at mile 3 when I decided,

this was quite possibly the worst $100 I have ever spent.

Failure would have been trying to bribe one of the police officers blocking off roads to let me hide in their car, like I wanted to. I would have paid top dollar.

Failure would have been making a u-turn at the 5k turn around at mile 7, when I wanted to die.

Failure would have been faking an injury to catch a ride with the medics, like I seriously debated doing.

Defeat would have been dumping my running shoes in the nearest trash can and deciding never to run again. (and maybe, if we hadn't just invested in a pretty pricey running stroller, I would have considered that option)

It was hard. Really hard.

I hadn't trained as intensely as I should have.

But I did it. I finished.

And really... finishing that race, slow as it was,

was a much bigger feat than anything like it that I have done before.

So I gathered my things, and texted my friends. I texted Charles. And I smiled... and looked for a bathroom.

Talking to my friends who ran, a lot of them had VERY similar thoughts and experiences on the course.

After a few minutes, we headed back to the car, on the glorious bus, where this time, again, I took my place squatting next to the bus driver, who was nice enough to pat me on the back as I threw up in his trash can.

Gluten, you win. I'm done.

As for those running shoes... I think I'm ready to lace up again tomorrow.

I've got something to prove.

Cowgirl Abigail

Abi's preschool had a western day this week. They have been studying Texas this month, and to end the unit, they had pony rides, and a cook out lunch. Abigail has been really excited about it for weeks. We went to see her at her "radio" as she called it. She has gotten to ride a pony a couple of times, so she was telling people that this was her second radio. She's basically a professional cowgirl.

She looks the part, that's for sure.

Her "pandanna"

That's a YeeHaw, if I've ever seen one.

She selected a special necklace for the day.

This one was given to me by my parents when I got accepted to BYU.

My dad said, you can go away to school, but you just remember where your heart is, and hurry back. My mom said, "Go find you a Texan boy to marry."

Well, I didn't find a texan boy to my liking, so I made one instead.

Oh yeah, this little girl was interested in looking at the ponies. Nothing more.

Not characteristic of this fearless little babe.

New accessories

This weekend charles was gone all day Saturday helping with the scouts. So we had a girls day. Abigail decided she wanted to surprise daddy- so she was very brave and we got her ears pierced. I half way expected to get there and her change her mind but I was wrong! She sat there still as a statue and didn't cry or anything. She did so well :) she loves her new flower earrings and is telling everyone about how brave she was.

Longing for Bluebonnets

I lived away from Texas for about 6 years.

There are lots of things I missed about it here.

I always missed my family, of course.

I missed the mexican food and the people here.

But every March-April... I LONGED for the bluebonnets.

Every year I seriously contemplated a spur of the moment trip when they were blooming.

Last Spring, after moving to Texas I anxiously awaited the bluebonnets to start showing up EVERYWHERE. But they didn't. The drought was so bad last spring that we really never got any bluebonnets or any wildflowers, really. One day I put the girls in the car and drove for almost 2 hours searching, but to no avail.

So far this year, we have been blessed with lots of big rain storms, and everywhere you go- the Bluebonnets are blooming. I am probably driving everyone insane with announcing every time I see some, but I just can't help myself. Abigail has joined me in the excitement as my "best bluebonnet hunter." She says she loves the 'Texas kind of flower' that she learned about at preschool.

Well, today Charles is at a Camporee with the scouts, so we have had a girls day having lots of girly fun, and I thought- what better way to wrap up the day than with a photo shoot in the bluebonnets.

Today has been one of those days, that Start to Finish- was just an EXCELLENT day. These girls bring me more happiness than I ever thought possible.

Out of respect for the flower, I can't pick favorites very well, so here is a link to the whole gallery. If you have a few minutes go check it out.

A day in Austin

Since we moved here, we haven't taken very many chances to actually go into Austin to do things. We have lots of good family things up here in Cedar Park, so we haven't ventured out much. We are changing that. There are lots of cool things to do, see, and EAT. A few weekends ago we went to Hop Doddy's for some good burgers, chili cheese fries (that totally make the drive worth it), and shakes. Healthy? No, but delicious, absolutely. I can't wait to go back to South congress and try more fun food. We met up with friends down there, and after lunch went to Zilker park and played. It was a gorgeous day. Say what you will about summers in Austin... but seriously, Fall, Winter and Spring are pretty awesome.

Tea Party on the grass

Flying Kites... or should I say... kite.

And Friends.

Next time I must take a picture of the food. Totally worth documenting :)

I see a future here...

Bonding...

Abigail has had a little bit of a hard time with Ellie lately. She tends to "ruin" everything Abi plays with. Its hard to get a 3 year old to understand that babies don't get the rules yet. As Ellie is getting bigger and understanding more, they are getting along better, and I am finally seeing a lot more moments of a budding friendship than the constant grumpies that have been around here lately. I love those moments, and hope they get more frequent.

Nobody can make Ellie laugh like Abi can.

When we take Abigail to preschool she always has to give Ellie a big hug and kiss, and when we pick her up, she runs to Ellie (not me, ahem) and gives her a big hug.

Abi loves introducing her 'baby sister' to anyone we meet.

Ellie loves giving Abigail big hugs and kisses.

They love dancing together.

Come to think of it... take toys out of the equation, and they are best buds.

Fancy girls

Abigail loves her friends.

She LOVES play dates... actually, she prays for them.

So we have been trying to do more of them.

I just love seeing little girls play.

Love these little Texans and their cowgirl boots :)

Fun with Daddy

Ellie is our thrill seeker. She loves to live on the edge.

She is constantly doing crazy things and getting hurt, or amazingly staying safe.

She climbed through every barricade we ever put at the bottom of the stairs.

She has NO fear.

She just giggles and begs for more when Charles throws her up in the air.

Abigail, on the other hand... is closer to my blood.

She is nervous about just about everything.

She took a long time to work up the nerve to go down slides.

Even now, when we go to the park, she has to work up to it.

She will sometimes ask for Charles to throw her up too.

Can you tell she really wants to like it, but is pretty terrified?

If not, take a look at the grip she has on his hoodie so she doesn't leave his arms.

Making a comeback.

I've been a pretty horrible blogger the last few months. Time to play catch up over the next few days. When we came back in January, Abigail started Preschool. She LOVES it. I love it. It is fun to have some time alone with Ellie, and on occasion, a little quiet time when Ellie is asleep while Abi is gone. Abi is a very social little lady, and loves getting to go play with friends twice a week. She fit right in and didn't look back.

I am naturally a really emotional person. No shocker to anyone who knows me well. I've been surprised how excited I have been for each of these new stages for Abigail, things that I think normally would be hard for me. She is growing up so fast. She is SO excited about each new thing she gets to do as she gets older, and I think I feed off of her excitement, it keeps me from getting weepy at the thought of Kindergarten in a year and a half...

Today we were driving to the store and had this conversation:

Abigail: "Hey Mom, when I get big, I won't have to go to the kids room at the gym anymore, huh?"

Me: "Oh yeah? Where will you go then?"

Abigail:"I will get to exercise with you! And I will get to buy the same clothes as you, and the same shoes, too, won't I?"

Me: Yes :)

I want to bottle her up and keep her just like this, and remember it when she gets older and teenage years present challenges. I couldn't help but think about my own Mom, and how much I hope I can be the kind of mom she has always been to me. Because at this point in life, there aren't too many people I would rather be around, and she is one of my best friends. I hope it is the same when my girls grow up.